Reflecting on what took place from Friday night till Sunday morning. I have to say, not only me alone. For sure the others who where there for the "Cross Encounter Weekend" were indeed blessed, relieved, renewed, strengthened and also happy of what God has done in our lives within the span of 3 days and 2 nights. In case some of you who do not know what is a "Cross Encounter Weekend" is all about, basically it's a time where one can experience inner healing, transformation of life and to bring about forgiveness. Not only that, it is also a time where we confess and repent from accumulated acts and thoughts of sin and find continual cleansing for one's life. Yeah, that basically the idea of "Cross Encounter Weekend". And so, below is what went on from my side of view and experience from this encounter weekend.
Night one. Which was a Friday. I left school almost at 7pm. Having in mind that I would be late for the first session. Thought the road would be jammed up with cars due to the off office hours where everyone's going back home from their workplace. Surprisingly the road was clear. I even managed to go for Mcdonald's drive thru to buy my dinner. Arrived to the place on time. Thank God for that. So the session started off, talking about ~What is CROSS Encounter?~
Next day, another session was about confession. Went through the life of David where he committed adultery when he was on the roof of his palace. Seeing a woman bathing. Rest of the story I guess you all would know how it goes. This session focused on the cause and consequences of sins that we ourselves have and that in order to live a whole life before God. We need His grace and mercy and to do our part to confess our sins before Him. After that session was a short break and then on to the next session. It was about repentance- a Father's love. Not only was it talking our Heavenly Father's love for us but also our own earthly father. Meaning our own dad. The prodigal son's journey of returning back to his dad was an example we used. And in this session, we were exposed to how many people in our society today are lacking of the father figure at home. That is why various problem arises in our community. We were asked to write an appreciation letter to our own dad. For those who's dad had passed away, they still have to write and one day when they go to their dad's grave, they can read it out to them.
For the part to write an appreciation to my own dad, it seems quite easy to just write. I already have in mind of what to write but the struggle came when I was to write it on the piece of paper that I'm holding on. During that time, I just felt it was hard to write. Even when I was able to write a few words, to continue on writing, it was quite a hard feeling. I just wanted to break down and cry but I just held back. Some of you may think, "What's so emo of writing just an appreciation letter to your own dad?, it's just writing only..." To be as transparent as possible, the relationship between my dad and I is ok. Not those like cannot chat those sort. We do chat but then it's just surface talk only. No much into any in depth talk. As you all know my dad is a pastor, and he pastors a church which is now about 1k people. I grew up with it that the fact my dad's a pastor, and he has the church as well as the family to attend to. For his personality, he is more or less much of the quiet type. But then since he started full time, he got to get out of the "timid" shell. He's the youngest in the family. Now as for me, probably I'm like him having those sort of soft spoken, shy type person. And I like to just having time on my own and not communicate much with my dad as he needs time to manage his ministry and so on and this continued on to now before the breakthrough which was about to take place.
Back to the difficulty to continue writing, and so I just felt heavy handed to write but eventually managed by God's grace to continue writing on that time everyone was having their lunch. As I just said I'll be as transparent as possible, here's what exactly I wrote to my dad:
"Appreciating you, as a dad: Having you as a dad, as well as my pastor in church. I'm grateful indeed to have a dad like you. Without you, I don't think I would be what I am today. If I'm not known to be a PK (Pastor's Kid), I wouldn't be able to have the courage to make friends etc that easily due to the shy personality that I have. (Probably you were so when you were young). Anyway, I would like to take this opportunity to express my gratitude and love. Even a thank you wouldn't be sufficient to convey. For all you've done, from my younger days till now and also the future. To the upbringing of me, trials we've been though and so on..."
And then at the last line of it, with trembling hands, I could not withold back any longer. Tears began to roll down... After awhile I was okay and I continued writing the remaining sentence:- "Always remember that I would always be your son, and you will always be my dad." After that sentence, a sense of relieve just came upon me. Because as far as I can remember, I do not recall writing any cards to my dad before to express my feelings etc.
I was glad that the sense of relieve came upon me, and I can say indeed it was a breakthrough. As time pass on, I pray and hope that the bond between my dad and I would be stronger. Done writing, I proceeded for lunch. After lunch was the session about receiving the healing for the wounded soul. Life of king Saul who falled due to his various sins. And the steps we can take to to heal the past hurts that we may have. The trauma that sometimes unaware, would come and taunt us. At night, the last night. Which was the top of it all. Encountering the cross. Being obedient, the cross of Jesus. We were brought through the timeline before Jesus was hung onto the cross, we see the process that Jesus had went through, just for us. To bear the sins of the world ALL by Himself at the cross. This made us very aware that how great our God is, and how magnificent was His love for us. It came the time where all of us who where there, holding the stronghold on the list of paper we have, that the sins we had, ticked in the piece of paper. Coming before the foot of the cross, repenting and crying out to God for forgiveness. We do not feel worthy at all because of the sins that we've done. Most of us cried, I myself cried too because I do have secret sins. Well, I'm human too, and I do have sin.
When we were ready, after repenting and confessing our sins at the foot of the cross. Each of us tore the stronghold list. Some find it hard to tear it as it's like tearing themselves apart. But with God's grace and affirmation we managed to break the strongholds we have before God as a symbolic act by tearing the pieces of paper. Different words of encouragement and affirmation that were given to different ones who were there. Indeed, it was a night to remember. Where we encountered the cross. Next day, was the last session. We shared our testimonies of how we went through the night where we were at the foot of the cross. Various ones shared and it was equally impactful for us who were listening. Then we learn how to surrender- the Lordship of Jesus Christ. And the guidelines from A-D, on how we must renew our belief system through Christ in order that we may have the correct behaviour when we encounter a problem or perhaps temptation. We ended with communion together. Battle had already started, Spiritual Warfare is not just a one day thing, it happens almost everyday. What more could we say? BRING IT ON! For we know we are VICTORIOUS in Christ Jesus. AMEN.
This "Cross Encounter Weekend" was conducted by both Ps. Victor Wong and Kelly. Thanks a lot for conducting this encounter weekend with the youth leaders of Charis Christian Centre.
